The Host Chapter 26: Returned

With give away incessantly very agreeing to do it, I became the teacher Jeb compulsi whizd.My class was informal. I answered questions alto spend a pennyher apparition subsequently(prenominal) dinner. I found that as languish as I was willing to do this, Ian and Doc and Jeb would leave me al unrivaled during the day so that I could concentrate on my chores. We incessantly convened in the kitchen I wish to help with the baking while I speak. It gave me an excuse to pause onwards answering a difficult question, and somew here to look when I didnt want to meet anyones look. In my in regularizeect, it bring downmed fitting my words were sometimes upsetting, be boldnesss my actions were al expressive styles for their good.I didnt want to admit that Jamie was right. Obviously, people didnt identical me. They couldnt I wasnt one of them. Jamie wish welld me, further that was fair now some crazy chemical answer that was far from rational. Jeb liked me, moreover Jeb wa s crazy. The anticipate of them didnt feed any excuse.No, they didnt like me. But things changed when I started talking.The maiden time I noticed it was the break of the day after I answered Docs questions at dinner I was in the glum bathing room, washing clothes with Trudy, Lily, and Jamie.Could you hand me the soap, please, Wanda? Trudy asked from my left over(p).An electric current ran done and through my body at the sound of my name spoken by a female utter. Numbly, I passed her the soap and then rinsed the sting arrive at my hand.thank you, she added.Youre welcome, I murmured. My voice cracked on the last syllable.I passed Lily in the antechamber a day later on my way to contract Jamie before dinner.Wanda, she said, nodding.Lily, I answered, my pharynx dry.Soon it wasnt just Doc and Ian who asked questions at night. It surprised me who the most vocal were exhausted Walter, his salute a worrisome shade of gray, was perpetu anyy interested in the Bats of the Singin g World. Heath, unremarkably silent, permitting Trudy and Geoffrey talk for him, was outspoken during these evenings. He had some fascination with upraise World, and though it was one of my least favorite stories to guarantee, he peppered me with questions until hed nabd every detail I knew. Lily was concerned with the mechanics of things-she wanted to get by concludely the ships that carried us from planet to planet, their pilots, their fuel. It was to Lily that I excuseed the cryotanks-something they had solely seen but few mute the purpose of. Shy Wes, usu exclusivelyy sitting close to Lily, asked not rough new(prenominal) planets but well-nigh this one. How did it work? No money, no indemnify for work-why did our souls society not fall apart? I tried to explain that it was not so diametrical from life in the caves. Did we not all work without money and share in the products of our labor equally?Yes, he interrupted me, shaking his head. But its different here-Jeb ha s a gun for the slackers.Everyone looked at Jeb, who winked, and then they all laughed.Jeb was in attendance about every other night. He didnt participate he just sat melodic themefully in the sanction of the room, occasionally grinning.He was right about the entertainment component part oddly, for we all had legs, the situation reminded me of the See Weeds. at that place had been a special statute title for entertainers there, like Comforter or Healer or Seeker. I was one of the Storytellers, so the transition to a teacher here on mankind had not been such a change, profession-wise, at least. It was a great deal the same in the kitchen after dark, with the smell of smoke and baking b engross away filling the room. Everyone was stuck here, as good as planted. My stories were something new, something to hypothesize about as healthy as the usual-the same endlessly repeated sweaty chores, the same thirty-five faces, the same memories of other faces that brought the same s orrow with them, the same fear and the same despair that had long been familiar companions. And so the kitchen was always full for my casual lessons. Only Sharon and Maggie were conspicuously and consistently absent.I was in about my fourth week as an informal teacher when life in the caves changed again.The kitchen was collectioned, as was usual. Jeb and Doc were the only ones missing besides the normal two. On the counter next to me was a metal tray of dark, quaggy rolls, swollen to twice the size theyd started at. They were entery for the oven, as soon as the current tray was done. Trudy checked every few minutes to make certain(a) nothing was burning.Often, I tried to get Jamie to talk for me when he knew the history well. I liked to watch the enthusiasm light up his face, and the way he used his hands to draw stick outs in the air. Tonight, Heidi wanted to know to a greater extent about the Dolphins, so I asked Jamie to answer her questions as well as he could.The humans always spoke with sadness when they asked about our newest acquisition. They saw the Dolphins as mirrors of themselves in the first years of the occupation. Heidis dark eye, confuse underneath her fringe of white-blond hair, were tight with sympathy as she asked her questions.They look more(prenominal) like huge dragonflies than fish, right, Wanda? Jamie almost always asked for corroboration, though he never waited for my answer. Theyre all leathery, though, with tierce, four, or five sets of wings, depending on how old they are, right? So they kind of fly through the water-its lighter than water here, less dense. They impart five, seven, or nine legs, depending on which gender they are, right, Wanda? They take hold three different genders. They have really long hands with tough, firm fingers that can conformation all kinds of things. They make cities under the water out of hard plants that bring out there, kind of like trees but not really. They arent as far on as we are, r ight, Wanda? Because theyve never made a spaceship or, like, telephones for communication. Humans were more advanced.Trudy pulled out the tray of baked rolls, and I bent to shove the next tray of rise dough into the hot, smoking hole. It in like mannerk a little jostling and balancing to get it in just right.As I sweated in front of the fire, I heard some kind of commotion outside the kitchen, echoing mastered the hall from somewhere else in the caves. It was hard, with all the random sound reverberations and strange acoustics, to judge distances here.Hey Jamie shouted nookie me, and I morose just in time to see the ski binding of his head as he sprinted out the door.I straightened out of my crouch and took a abuse after him, my sense to follow.Wait, Ian said. Hell be back. Tell us more about the Dolphins.Ian was sitting on the counter beside the oven-a hot seat that I wouldnt have chosen-which made him close enough to stool out and touch my wrist. My arm flinched away from the unlooked-for contact, but I stayed where I was.Whats going on out there? I asked. I could still hear some kind of jabbering-I sight I could hear Jamies excited voice in the mix.Ian shrugged. Who knows? Maybe Jeb He shrugged again, as if he wasnt interested enough to twainer with figuring it out. Nonchalant, but there was a tension in his eyes I didnt understand.I was sure I would find out soon enough, so I shrugged, too, and started explaining the incredibly complex familial relationships of the Dolphins while I helped Trudy stack the inviolable bread in plastic containers.Six of the nine grandparents, so to speak, traditionally stay with the larvae through their first stage of development while the three parents work with their six grandparents on a new wing of the family rest home for the young to inhabit when they are mobile, I was explaining, my eyes on the rolls in my hands rather than my audience, as usual, when I heard the gasp from the back of the room. I continued w ith my next sentence automatically as I scanned the crowd to see who Id upset. The remaining three grandparents are customarily obscureNo one was upset with me. Every head was false in the same direction I was looking. My eyes skipped across the backs of their heads to the dark exit.The first thing I saw was Jamies slight figure, clinging to someones arm. somebody so mirky, head to toe, that he almost blended right in with the cave wall. Someone too tall to be Jeb, and anyway, there was Jeb just tush Jamies shoulder. purge from this distance, I could see that Jebs eyes were narrowed and his nose wrinkled, as if he were anxious-a rare emotion for Jeb. respectable as I could see that Jamies face was bright with sheer joy.Here we go, Ian muttered beside me, his voice barely audible supra the crackle of the flames.The dirty man Jamie was still clinging to took a step forward. virtuoso of his hands rose slowly, like an involuntary reflex, and curled into a fist.From the dirty figur e came Jareds voice-flat, perfectly devoid of any inflection. What is the meaning of this, Jeb?My throat closed. I tried to swallow and found the way blocked. I tried to fleet and was not successful. My heart drummed unevenly.Jared Melanies exultant voice was loud, a silent vociferate of elation. She burst into radiant life inside my head. Jared is homeWanda is teaching us all about the universe, Jamie babbled eagerly, somehow not catching on to Jareds fury-he was too excited to pay attention, maybe.Wanda? Jared repeated in a low voice that was almost a snarl.There were more dirty figures in the hall behind him. I only noticed them when they echoed his snarl with an outraged muttering.A blond head rose from the frozen audience. Paige lurched to her feet. Andy she cried, and stumbled through the figures seated most her. One of the dirty men stepped around Jared and caught her as she nearly skin over Wes. Oh, Andy she sobbed, the dance step of her voice reminding me of Melanies.P aiges outburst changed the atmosphere momentarily. The silent crowd began to murmur, most of them rising to their feet. The sound was one of welcome now, as the legal age went to greet the returned travelers. I tried to read the strange sayings on their faces as they forced grins onto their lips and peeked furtively back at me. I realized after a long, slow second-time seemed to be congealing around me, freezing me into place-that the expression I wondered at was guilt.Its going to be okay, Wanda, Ian murmured under his breath.I glanced at him wildly, meddling for that same guilt on his face. I didnt find it, only a defensive tightening around his vivid eyes as he stared at the newcomers.What the hell, people? a new voice boomed.Kyle-easily identifiable by his size despite the grime-was shoving his way around Jared and heading toward me.Youre letting it tell you its lies? Have you all gone crazy? Or did it lead the Seekers here? Are you all parasites now?Many heads fell forward, ashamed. Only a few kept their chins stiffly in the air, their shoulders squared Lily, Trudy, Heath, Wes and frail Walter, of all people.Easy, Kyle, Walter said in his feeble voice.Kyle ignored him. He walked with deliberate lean toward me, his eyes, the same vibrant cobalt as his companions, glowing with rage. I couldnt pass my eyes on him, though-they kept returning to Jareds dark shape, trying to read his camouflaged face.Melanies love flowed through me like a lake bursting through a dam, distracting me even more from the enraged barbarian closing the distance quickly.Ian slid into my view, base to place himself in front of me. I strained my neck to the side to pass on my view of Jared clear.Things changed while you were gone, brother.Kyle halted, face slack with disbelief. Did the Seekers come, then, Ian?Shes not a danger to us.Kyle ground his teeth together, and from the corner of my eye, I saw him reach for something in his pocket.This captured my attention at last. I cr inged, expecting a weapon. The words stumbled off my tongue in a choked whisper. Dont get in his way, Ian.Ian didnt suffice to my plea. I was surprised at the amount of anxiety this caused me, at how much I didnt want him shock. It wasnt the instinctive defendion, the bone-deep need to protect, that I felt for Jamie or even Jared. I just knew that Ian should not be harmed trying to protect me.Kyles hand came back up, and a light shone out of it. He pointed it at Ians face, held it there for a moment. Ian didnt flinch from the light.So, what, then? Kyle demanded, putting the flashlight back in his pocket. Youre not a parasite. How did it get to you?Calm down, and well tell you all about it.No.The contradiction did not come from Kyle but from behind him. I watched Jared walk slowly toward us through the silent spectators. As he got closer, Jamie still clinging to his hand with a bewildered expression, I could read his face better under the mask of dirt. Even Melanie, all but deliri ous with happiness at his safe return, could not misunderstand the expression of loathing there.Jeb had wasted his efforts on the wrong people. It didnt matter that Trudy or Lily was verbalise to me, that Ian would put himself between his brother and me, that Sharon and Maggie made no hostile move toward me. The only one who had to be convinced had now, finally, decided.I dont think anyone needfully to calm down, Jared said through his teeth. Jeb, he continued, not looking to see if the old man had followed him forward, give me the gun.The silence that followed his words was so distort I could feel the pressure inside my ears.From the instant I could distinctly see his face, Id known it was over. I knew what I had to do now Melanie was in agreement. As quietly as I could, I took a step to the side and slightly back, so that I would be clear of Ian. hence I closed my eyes.Dont happen to have it on me, Jeb drawled.I peeked through narrowed eyes as Jared whirled to assess the trut h of Jebs claim.Jareds breath whistled angrily through his nostrils. Fine, he muttered. He took another step toward me. It will be slower this way, though. It would be more humane if you were to find that gun fast.Please, Jared, lets talk, Ian said, set his feet firmly as he spoke, already knowing the answer.I think theres been too much talk, Jared growled. Jeb left this up to me, and Ive made my decision.Jeb cleared his throat noisily. Jared spun halfway around to look at him again.What? he demanded. You made the witness, Jeb.Well, now, thats true.Jared turned back toward me. Ian, get out of my way.Well, well, hold on a sec, Jeb went on. If you recall, the rule was that whoever the body belonged to got to make the decision.A vein in Jareds forehead pulsed visibly. And?Seems to me like theres someone here with a claim just as strong as yours. Mebbe stronger.Jared stared straight ahead, processing this. After a slow moment, grounds furrowed his brow. He looked down at the boy stil l pause on his arm.All the joy had drained from Jamies face, leaving it pale and horrorstruck.You cant, Jared, he choked. You wouldnt. Wandas good. Shes my friend And Mel What about Mel? You cant kill Mel Please You have to - He bust off, his expression agonized.I closed my eyes again, trying to block the picture of the suffering boy from my mind. It was already almost impossible not to go to him. I locked my muscles in place, promising myself that it wouldnt help him if I moved now.So, Jeb said, his tone far too conversational for the moment, you can see that Jamies not in agreement. I figure hes got as much say as you do.There was no answer for so long that I had to open my eyes again.Jared was staring at Jamies anguished, fearful face with his own kind of horror.How could you let this happen, Jeb? he whispered.There is a need for some talk, Jeb answered. why dont you take a breather first, though? Maybe youll feel more up to conversation after a bath.Jared glared balefully at t he old man, his eyes full of the shock and pain of the betrayed. I had only human comparisons for such a look. Caesar and Brutus, Jesus and Judas.The unbearable tension lasted through another long minute, and then Jared shook Jamies fingers off his arm.Kyle, Jared barked, turning and stalking out of the room.Kyle gave his brother a parting grimace and followed.The other dirty members of the expedition went after them silently, Paige tucked securely under Andys arm.Most of the other humans, all those who had hung their heads in shame for admitting me into their society, shuffled out behind them. Only Jamie, Jeb, and Ian beside me, and Trudy, Geoffrey, Heath, Lily, Wes, and Walter stayed.No one spoke until the echoes of their footsteps faded away into silence.Whew Ian breathed. That was close. Nice thinking, Jeb.Inspiration in desperation. But were not out of the woods yet, Jeb answered.Dont I know it You didnt leave the gun anywhere obvious, did you?Nope. I figured this might be com in on soon.Thats something, at least.Jamie was trembling, all in the space left by the exodus. Surrounded by those I had to count as friends, I felt able to walk to his side. He threw his arms around my waist, and I patted his back with shaky hands.Its okay, I lie in a whisper. Its okay. I knew even a fool would hear the false note in my voice, and Jamie was not a fool.He wont hurt you, Jamie said thickly, struggling against the tears I could see in his eyes. I wont let him.Shh, I murmured.I was appalled-I could feel that my face was fixed in lines of horror. Jared was right-how could Jeb have let this happen? If theyd killed me the first day here, before Jamie had ever seen me Or that first week, while Jared kept me isolated from everyone, before Jamie and I had become friends Or if I had just kept my mouth fill up about Melanie It was too late for all that. My arms tightened around the child.Melanie was just as aghast. My poor baby.I told you it was a bad idea to tell him everyt hing, I reminded her.What will it do to him now, when we die?Its going to be terrible. Hell be traumatized and scarred and devastated Melanie interrupted me. Enough. I know, I know. But what can we do?Not die, I suppose.Melanie and I thought about the likelihood of our option and felt despair.Ian thumped Jamie on the back-I could feel the motion reverberate through both our bodies.Dont agonize over it, kid, he said. Youre not in this alone.Theyre just shocked, thats all. I recognized Trudys alto voice behind me. Once we get a chance to explain, theyll see reason.See reason? Kyle? someone hissed almost unintelligibly.We knew this was coming, Jeb muttered. Just got to weather it. Storms pass.Maybe you ought to find that gun, Lily suggested calmly. Tonight might be a long one. Wanda can stay with Heidi and me -I think it might be better to keep her somewhere else, Ian disagreed. Maybe in the southern tunnels? Ill keep an eye on her. Jeb, wanna lend me a hand?They wouldnt look for her with me. Walters widen was just a whisper.Wes spoke over the last of Walters words. Ill tag on with you, Ian. Therere six of them.No, I finally managed to choke out. No. Thats not right. You shouldnt make out with each other. You all belong here. You belong together. Not fighting, not because of me.I pulled Jamies arms from around my waist, holding his wrists when he tried to stop me.I just need a minute to myself, I told him, ignoring all the stares I could feel on my face. I need to be alone. I turned my head to find Jeb. And you should have a chance to discuss this without me listening. Its not fair-having to discuss strategy in front of the enemy.Now, dont be like that, Jeb said. allow me have some time to think, Jeb.I stepped away from Jamie, dropping his hands. A hand fell on my shoulder, and I cringed.It was just Ian. Its not a good idea for you to be wandering around by yourself.I leaned toward him and tried to pitch my voice so low that Jamie wouldnt hear me clearly. Why prolong the inevitable? Will it get easier or harder for him?I thought I knew the answer to my last question. I ducked under Ians hand and broke into a run, sprinting for the exit.Wanda Jamie called after me.Someone quickly shushed him. There were no footsteps behind me. They must have seen the wisdom of letting me go.The hall was dark and deserted. If I was lucky, Id be able to cut around the edge of the big tend plaza in the dark with no one the wiser.In all my time here, the one thing Id never found was the way out. It seemed as if Id been down every tunnel time and again, and Id never seen an opening I hadnt eventually explored in search of one thing or another. I thought about it now as I crept through the deepest shady corners of the big cave. Where could the exit be? And I thought about this if I could figure that puzzle out, would I be able to leave?I couldnt think of anything worth leaving for-certainly not the desert waiting outside, but also not the Seeker, not the Hea ler, not my Comforter, not my life before, which had left such a shallow impression on me. Everything that really mattered was with me here. Jamie. though he would kill me, Jared. I couldnt imagine walking away from either of them.And Jeb. Ian. I had friends now. Doc, Trudy, Lily, Wes, Walter, Heath. Strange humans who could overlook what I was and see something they didnt have to kill. Maybe it was just curiosity, but regardless of that, they were willing to side with me against the rest of their tight-knit family of survivors. I shook my head in wonder as I traced the rough rock with my hands.I could hear others in the cavern, on the far side from me. I didnt pause they could not see me here, and Id just found the crevice I was looking for.After all, there was really only one place for me to go. Even if I could somehow have guessed the way to escape, I would still have gone this way. I crept into the blackest darkness imaginable and hurried along my way.